What’s in a name? Everything.

I met someone at the weekend. We’d matched on Tinder last week, got talking, made plans to meet. After four days of all day texting, one night mid reply, he calls me. I thought it was an accident but no, there’s something he needs to tell me. My smile froze on my face and words... Continue Reading →

A long overdue spring clean

I used to blame the ebbs and flows of interest I had in some men to the emotional highs and lows of my mental health. And ... that's exactly what it is. However, throw in some temporary sobriety, exercise, and being off my meds, I've (not for the first time) realised, I choose the wrong... Continue Reading →

There were four in my bed and my mental health said …

I slept with four different men last week. None were strangers to me, like that somehow makes a difference, but I’ll point it out anyway. I’ve done worse, as my long-term readers know from the three-in-a-day episode several years ago but it’s been a long time since I’ve smashed (forgive the pun) out so many... Continue Reading →

The mistress returns – part 2

He answered the door dressed in board shorts and a flanno. “I knew you weren’t naked,” I said to his surprised face. “Well, I was but you know, I can’t just answer the door without any clothes on.” “But you told me you were naked.” “And I was. Didn’t you notice how long it took... Continue Reading →

The mistress returns

Sunday morningActually thinking cage for the day. Haven’t worn it for awhileDoes that still work for you when no one has ordered you to wear it?Yea it does. It’s all fun.Hot.It’s much better when someone has the key. But hey. Got to do what we go to do.What happened to date girl?Another one goneSo I’ll... Continue Reading →

The return of Tom

I’ve written about this before, but it’s really spooky the way men from my past come out of the woodwork within days of becoming single. The Serbian fuck buddy who relishes my experience. The older surfer who doesn’t want a relationship but is obsessed with my butt. The married guy I never met but routinely... Continue Reading →

Enough Tom. Enough now

After more than nine months without contact, Tom slid into my inbox. I was angry, so angry. I didn’t believe his reason for contacting me. It’s no longer his business what I’m doing or how I am. But, there he was. An unread email. We back and forthed, my anger a hot white rage. I... Continue Reading →

Hello dirty girl, I missed you

I forgot how much I missed kink - talking about it with people who get it, who love it, who are passionate about having a great sex.  Coming out of a very vanilla non-relationship, I realised how much I missed the excitement, the physicality, the mental switch to a sub or domme space. There is... Continue Reading →

Letting go of what’s bad for me

Going cold turkey is never easy. The first couple of days I am buoyed by hurt and anger, steadfast in my decision, confident I deserve better. By day four, my resolve starts to weaken. I find myself thinking of you in the shower, in the car, watching TV, eating breakfast. I start to check my... Continue Reading →

Never have I ever

Maybe because it's overcast and drizzling rain but my mood is all bad teenage poetry today. I'm totally aware how pathetic it sounds and how poorly it's written but all that combined speaks to the way I feel right now. Indulge me in my melancholy. We’ve shared a bed but never a meal.We’ve exchanged messages... Continue Reading →

You may call me Mistress: Part 2

Ready as I was ever going to be, I ordered him to the bedroom where I met him with a long kiss. I gripped the riding crop in my right hand and roughly grabbed the cage encasing his cock with my left. I whispered in his ear: “Are you ready to play, my slutty little... Continue Reading →

You may call me Mistress: Part 1

He answered the door wearing his collar, like I’d told him to. A muffled clink gave away the secret beneath his clothes. He’d been wearing the cage around his cock since early that morning, after admitting he touched himself when he woke up. It was now 7.30pm.  I sidestepped around his welcome kiss and put my... Continue Reading →

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