Those three little words

There’s something magical about someone saying they love you for the first time. Your mouth widens involuntarily into a stupid grin, your heart beats faster and you giggle like a schoolgirl at a slumber party. At least that was the case when J said it to me yesterday. It took me by surprise given we... Continue Reading →

My name is AndrewNotChris – Part II

22 September 2017 My best friend once told me I trust too quickly and too easily. That I take people at their word, when others would question their motives. And I fall quickly and hard. I fell for him. And after Terrible Tuesday when his web of deceit began to unravel, that was the time... Continue Reading →

Is there such a thing as a primary school sweetheart?

I think we were both nervous. It had been 10 years since we’d last seen each other, 10 years since our first kiss and our first fuck. We’d known each other since Year 4, had sat next to each other in class, caught the same school bus. Hell, we lived in the same neighbourhood, an... Continue Reading →

Riding the Italian Stallion

August 2017 It was a last-minute invite for sex at his place. It had been almost two weeks since I said goodbye to AndrewNotChris which means it had been two weeks since I'd last had sex. While I don't buy into my housemates' theory of not being able to go longer than two weeks, it... Continue Reading →

When you’re infertile and dating, when do you talk about kids?

Today I went shopping for clothes I don’t need for a “divorce” cruise I’m heading off on this Friday. It’s not actually a divorce cruise but the timing of the end of my marriage just happened to coincide with a trip my friend and her husband were going on and I was talked into it... Continue Reading →

My name is AndrewNotChris – Part I

July 2017 I had been off work for two weeks before I could get an appointment with a psychologist. I had been seeing a psych regularly after my infertility diagnosis in 2014. Wendy and I would meet fortnightly or sometimes weekly, depending on how low my mood was. I was taking anti-depressants but it helped... Continue Reading →

My name is ChrisNotChris – Part IV

July 2017 They say karma is a bitch but on this occasion, she was my friend and ally. The morning after Terrible Tuesday, I rang in sick to work. I couldn’t yet face what Chris has told me and sleep beckoned me like a Turkish rug dealer. I messaged my best friend J to tell... Continue Reading →

My name is ChrisNotChris – Part III

4 July 2017 We nicknamed it Terrible Tuesday although the fact that “we” nicknamed anything already reveals there’s more to this story. If I’d been smart, there would never have been a “we” after such a day. He was on his way to the snow and decided to crash at my place and get up... Continue Reading →

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